


Dulce Et Decorum Est

by springburn



Series: Dr Who mini fics and prompts [9]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst and Feels, F/M, Falling In Love, Fear, Love Confessions, Shameless Whouffaldi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-06
Updated: 2015-10-06
Packaged: 2018-04-25 03:55:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4945771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/springburn/pseuds/springburn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor and Clara are on board the Tardis at the Drum Lake Base......</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dulce Et Decorum Est

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place during the Under the Lake episode. 
> 
> Spoilers. Whouffaldi season nine. 
> 
> The Doctor and Clara and how they feel.......how do they feel? 
> 
> My interpretation.........
> 
> Dulce et Decorum Est.......It is Sweet and Right

DULCE ET DECORUM EST. 

She was changed, altered, different.  
He'd noticed the slow progression.  
More reckless.  
Hardened.  
She'd been schooling him in 'how to be more caring'.  
Little cards......prompts, so that he'd know what to say in any given situation.  
To prevent a faux pas.  
"You open your mouth and put your foot in it." She told him, severely.  
Good manners.....how to behave around humans.  
Yet she'd become less caring herself.  
She suffered fools no more gladly than he.  
Her old empathy somehow diminished. 

As she sought to make his responses more human, her own had become less so.  
He found himself watching her, increasingly concerned. 

Since Christmas, when they'd all but eloped, run off together to the stars, she flung herself into every situation with such abandon.  
Devil may care.  
Each time he dropped her back home, he felt relieved that he actually could.  
Grateful that she'd not been lost or injured......or worse.  
They came pretty close on a couple of occasions.  
It petrified him.  
To the point where he was deliberately choosing more tame destinations, places she would enjoy, but could stay out of trouble.  
Where, hopefully, there was no hidden danger around every corner. 

The planet of the Long Necks was a case in point.  
It was basically just one long, wild New Years Eve party.  
What could possibly go wrong?  
Somehow they became separated.  
The next time he saw her, his Clara.....who seldom drank, she was smashed out of her brain on some 'cosmic cocktail', wrapped seductively around one of the hosts.  
Who, it had to be said, was NOT enjoying her attentions.  
He'd pulled her off, dragged her, complaining bitterly, back to the Tardis.  
"Oh, Doctor, you'rrrrre no fun!" She slurred.  
She had hiccups, she smelled like a brewery, and she was all over him like a rash.  
Hugging him, her arms around his neck one minute, hands everywhere the next, then her face inches from his.  
Desperately trying to kiss him. 

Trouble was, she was a very difficult girl to say no to.  
She was Clara, after all.  
His Clara.  
The bossy control freak.  
Oh and he loved her so very much, nothing would give him greater pleasure than to press his lips to hers, but no......it would be taking unfair advantage, in her inebriated state.  
He would never do that, not ever.  
She'd never forgive him.  
Did she really want him like that anyway? Or was it the drink talking?  
And what if his instincts were wrong?  
He couldn't risk it.  
Their friendship would be destroyed, he would lose her forever, over one moment of weakness.  
So he'd held her at arms length, gave her a severe admonishment.  
Carried her to bed......fended her off when she tried to undo his flies.

Oh yes, she'd definitely lost her dignity that day.  
As well as her sunglasses. 

Now, she was standing beside the Tardis door, with a slight defiance.  
Ready to sally forth without a second thought, into she knew not what danger.  
No thought for her own safety, no whisper of fear, or that something may happen to her.  
"I'm fine......Doctor!"  
Supremely confident in His ability to come up trumps, every time.  
Total trust.  
Blind faith.  
The kind of reliance that could easily get her killed. 

He suggested she find a hobby.......or a relationship......  
Her face clouded when he said those words.  
The smile dropped.  
A slight raise of the eyebrows, a sadness, creeping across her features.  
The dimples on her cheeks fading, her eyes scanning his face.....searching, questioning, swimming with a well of emotion that she fought to suppress.  
What did he see there?  
In that sorrowful expression.  
Adoration.  
That's what he saw.  
It terrified him.  
For a moment he was sure she was going to say something, she opened her mouth.......then hesitated.  
What was it she wanted to say to him?  
That remained unsaid?  
Gone.  
The moment passed.

His mind flickered back to Skaro.  
The fleeting moment he watched her vaporised.  
For that brief time, he really thought he'd lost her, and part of him died.  
Right there.  
Would never be the same again.  
Only later did he convince himself, it must be some kind of trick, some ruse, to make him abandon hope.  
Had he really though?  
Had he truly believed her gone?  
Always, some tiny part of him held on to the belief, that she was out there somewhere.  
Living, breathing, and it fuelled his very soul. 

He compared the melancholic look she was giving him now, with her face as the Dalek casing opened.

So close.  
He'd come so close to killing her himself.

Missy.

Playing with him, toying with his affections. As she always did.  
Jerking his strings.  
Curse her.  
Except she was so astute.....a Timelady.....and she knew.  
Of course she did. She would always be able to tell, she was from Gallifrey.  
One of his own kind.  
Reading his mind.  
It was written there in letters ten feet high.  
Even though he hadn't read it there himself. 

THE DOCTOR LOVES CLARA.

Equally, Missy had known Clara's mind too.  
How many times had she given herself away?  
Just the looks she gave him.  
Like a love sick puppy.  
Oh, how it amused her!  
Why else had she asked Clara to say 'you are my friend' 'I love you' when she was inside that carapace?  
Because she was well aware.  
She knew just how it would translate through the Dalek synapses.

What she hadn't bargained for, however, was the strength of that 'inferior' mind.  
The power behind it.  
Sheer force of will, as it begged for 'mercy'. 

There it all was, in that face.  
Tear stained, desperately trying to hold it together, the sheer and utter relief as the panels slid back and Clara was revealed.  
The way she sobbed his name, "Doctor.....!" 

CLARA LOVES THE DOCTOR. 

Now here they were, facing each other again, in the relative safety of the Tardis.  
She, about to go native, once again.  
Rashly chasing adventure.  
All thoughts of being inside that tin can, banished, all those intense feelings of fear and anguish pushed aside, buried.  
And it wasn't right.  
It wasn't Clara. 

What to say now?  
What to do?  
She was regarding him, fondly, head tilted slightly to one side, arms folded, waiting....  
"I have a duty of care....." He ended lamely.  
Her knowing smile returned.  
'Which you take very seriously.....I know." 

He could not continue.......could not say the words that ought to be said, the realisation had been so slow to dawn on him, this new body had such difficulty processing these complicated feelings.  
No wonder he needed Clara's prompt cards, how could he possibly begin to make her understand.......  
That he was frightened for her, that he cared for her so much, that he loved her dearly. 

"So can I stop now....?"

"Yes, please do......."

She gave a little laugh as she spun on her heel and turned away..........

**Author's Note:**

> Just something I woke up with this morning and wrote down. Hope you like it.


End file.
